Saturday, April 24, 2010

First Experience With Death and Dying

Aiden greatgrandmother died last week.  She was the last of Dawn and my grandparents.  We took Aidan to the service.  There was no open casket, which was a relief.  I did not want to take him if there was.  So, of course, he started to ask a lot of questions. 

"What is dying?"

"People get really old and they stop breathing."


This is when I repeat the previous answer!

So he was OK with this.  He was concerned that his grandfather was sad so we explained that his mother had died. 

But the next morning, he made the connection to me and to himself.  He asked, "Daddy, are you going to die?"

"Yes, everyone dies but not for a really long time."

"I don't want you to die."

So this not an easy moment but I had to keep a "normal" tone of voice.  I snuggled him and we talked more, mostly along the same lines. 

A hard conversation but a good one that will hopefully be a good base for other deaths in the future.  Hard as it is, death is a part of life.  

Saturday, April 17, 2010

The Agony of Defeat

Aidan has gotten to the point where he can play a whole game of Chutes and Ladders and understands winning.  He beat me first and apparently beats his babysitter.  However, I did win the other day and he was quite upset.  I explained about winning and losing and that we can't always win but the point is to have fun together.  He seemed OK but woke up the next morning and said, "Daddy, I am still a little bit sad because you beat me at Chutes and Ladders."